Monday, August 20, 2007

2 Down...20 To Go




Just a quick update. I took my second test tonight: Exodus and only got an 89 on it. I mean its not bad but I accidentally hit the the enter button and it submitted it with out me double checking my answers. Oh well. Only 20 more tests for this course!

Next week Victoria and I start our pilates class which is on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I can't wait.

Grace and Peace
~Jenny

Friday, August 17, 2007

5 Amazing Years...


Happy Anniversary Sara and Jay!

Today has been five years that my awesome sister has married one of the best guys I have ever met in my life.

On August 17, 2002 I saw my sister walk down the aisle towards Jay to start what has become to me a great example of an awesome marriage. In every marriage there are ups and downs but with God truly being the center you see more of the good. They are truly an encouragement to me. I couldn't of asked for anyone better for my sister than Jay.

I will never forget the first time that Jay met my sister (for all of you who don't know, Jay and I were friends before he ever knew Sara). She was in a traveling drama ministry and they came to our Church for a performance. A little while later Jay asked how she was doing...he had only met her once and I'm pretty sure that is all he needed. I kept thinking, why does he care how Sara is doing and then it hit me!! She came back a few months later and we had some people over our apartment to hang out. He walked in and literally took her breath away...(so sweet).

They are the traveling couple for sure. A good chunk of their relationship was spent apart (especially hard when planning a wedding by the way). Jay was in Costa Rica, Egypt, California. Sara was in Romania for a bit. A year after they were married they moved to California, then two years later are in Maryland now they are living in England, oh where will these two end up next?? (hopefully closer to me?)

Two years ago today at 3:00 am I was woken up by a phone call. Before even answering it I knew I was going to become and Auntie!! Sure enough for their third wedding anniversary they were given the wonderful gift of becoming pregnant with Jed.

Here is to five amazing, adventurous years...can't wait to see whats to come! I love you and miss you tons. Thank you both for being so wonderful...

I heart you,
Jenny
(I stole that picture from you! haha)

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Healing


(Again playing some catch up for everyone in this post)

"Praise the Lord, O my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name. Praise the Lord, O my soul; and forget not all his benefits-who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases," (Psalm 103 1-3 NIV)

On my 19th birthday I was diagnosed with Cervical Dysplasia (HPV). There are several stages to this and is known as a precancerous condition. Since then I have had to go ever three to six months for tests and biopsies to check for cancerous cells. 90% of the time they would come back positive as to having the cancerous cells. I have been told since the age of 19 that future with children looked risky and some even said impossible. For me, that was fine. I was/am open 100% for adoption, but being that young you really don't want to hear those words. How do you explain to whom ever you date (if you think it might get serious enough) that Oh by the way I may not be able to have kids and I might develop cervical cancer...easily, you say it just like that. Well at least I did. You get nervous of ever having to have that conversation. You think who the heck is ever going to want to date me and once they hear that will they actually stick around??

On July 17 after an ER visit, more doctor visits and a bunch of not so much fun tests I got some amazing news...No more cancerous cells...No more of the HPV!! Completely in the clear. No signs of not being able to have children. I had to have the doctor repeat it about three times, I was shaking. Healing has taken place, amazingly and only one to thank for that...God. Seriously amazing. I won't have to have that conversation, ahhhh what a weight lifted from my shoulders. I might actually go out on a date, who would of thought

Below are some e-mails I sent out as prayer requests about all of this back in June and July of this year. They go in order of oldest to newest...

June 26, 2007:

Hello,

Just wanted to fill you in and ask for prayer over the next week. Saturday I was in an extreme amount of pain in my pelvic area. It hurt to sit, stand or lie down, however I put it off for a day and just popped a ton of Advil. It didn't get much better come Sunday so I called my doctor and she suggested I got to the hospital with my medical history. I went had a few exams, blood work, ultrasound, etc and they said there was some loose fluid near my right ovary in the ultrasound and it concluded that I had a functional cyst on my right ovary that burst and that was the source of all the pain. I need to follow up with my regular doctor near the end of this week for another exam and see what she has to say also. A functional cyst from my understanding doesn't seem to be extremely serious (doesn't lead to ovarian cancer), but never the less its a bit scary to deal with. I have an appointment Thursday morning with my regular doctor, and I'll let you know what happens then.

Thanks for praying. Jenny

June 28, 2007:
Hello I went to the doctors today, and no more answers for now. She had my results from the hospital faxed over and decided i needed more blood work (three tubes) and have to go back next week for another exam. Thanks for praying and I'll keep you posted. Jenny

July 5, 2007:
Hello,
So another follow up, I went back to the doctors today and had another exam and got the results of my blood work from last week. The blood work came back normal. As for the exam, she said that she thinks it will come back abnormal and may need to go see another doctor with in the next week, week and a half. She will have the results of this weeks exam hopefully by the middle of next week and we will go from there. No solid answers yet, but please keep praying. My doctor and I talked today and the worst case scenario is that my pre-existing condition has become worse over the past two years and possible surgery in a not so distant future. As for now, more doctor visits, exams and biopsy's. Thanks for all the prayers. ~Jenny

July 17, 2007:
Hello,
I just received a call from my doctors regarding my test results. For the past six or seven years I have been having some health problems (the detection of pre-cancerous cells). I have been told time and time again, that my chances of having children are very slight, and lately have been told that I might be having surgery in a not too distant future. Just wanted to say thank you all for your prayers during all this, and to let you know that my results came back completely negative on ALL my tests! There were NO signs of cancerous cells. I won't have having to go back for any biopsy's!! Thanks again! I'm shaking, I am so excited!!

~Jenny

Grace and Peace ~
Jenny

"For Nothing is impossible with God" (Luke 1:37 NIV)

Monday, August 13, 2007

Back to School...well kind of

So I decided to take an online bible course. The actual title is Survey of the Bible part 1 (Genesis - Song). I took my first test the other day (Genesis) and got 100!!

Please pray that I complete the course. Its online so its a go at your own pace type course, which is nice but can also be bad some times. Its a survey course so you are skimming the books during the lessons and gleaning the meanings and importance of each book. You are expect to read them more in depth out side of the lesson.

Oh Starry Night, Family Vacation, etc...



This past weekend there was a meteor shower (if you didn't know that already). Topher, Victoria and I decided to go camping up at the Pinnacles on Saturday Night. When we got there we set up our site and headed off to the park for some hiking. Victoria really wanted to see the bats so we went to the caves and of course there were loud people in front of us, so there were no bats to be found. We ended up at a cool spot to take some photos and hung out there looking at the creatures, dragonflies and frogs for a while. At dusk the bats started to come out!!! Oh boy for someone like me who doesn't really like them it was a little weird at first but after a while with them flying over head and coming really really close at some point I got kind of used to it. We hung out for a bit longer and watched as the stars started to come out. Man what a beautiful scene. I forget how much I miss looking up and seeing the sky like that. You don't get that much out here.

We decided to hike back a little after 9 (so it was pretty darn dark), we had to walk back threw some caves which was an adventure! We saw a baby fox on the way back. Drove back to the camp ground, cooked dinner then headed out to an open spot to start taking some pictures. I saw a good number of shooting stars...didn't catch any with the camera but thats fine. After a while of trying to figure out how to actually capture the stars in general, we finally go there (as you can see by the photos above). I didn't get all that many photos (posted about 14 on my flickr site) because I feel asleep in the jeep!

We had fun, saw a bunch of creatures...deer, bats, frogs, fox, bunny, vultures, dragonflies etc. nice relaxing weekend and hope to do it again soon. I didn't realize how much I missed camping and doing out doors kind of things.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

July 20 - 29th Family Vacation to Monterey!


Dad, Sue and Biz came out for the week to see me! WoooHooo.

Really couldn't of asked for a better time. It was their first trip out here to visit and hopefully not their last. We did a lot in a week, I'll give you the break down:

Friday they arrived and took the scenic drive down from San Fran. We went out to eat on Fisherman's Wharf. Saturday was nice and relaxing, went for a walk down the beach and around town. Sunday again was a lot of relaxing (we all got a lot of reading done...I finished the last Harry Potter in a week!) and that night we had a cook out and Luke and Lisa's place so they could meet some of my friends (and Sara and Jay's Friends too). Monday I took them to First Awakenings for breakfast (Sara and Jay's suggestion), then off to the Aquarium to check out the fish and to Canary Row. Tuesday we ended up in Carmel for the afternoon, ate at an awesome little place and had a great bottle of wine with lunch, then headed off to Chateau Julien for our wine tasting (oh boy it was really good!!), then to Farmer's Market. Biz got her birthday present there, a Henna Tattoo. Dad really enjoyed the farmer's market. Wednesday was Point Lobos and Big Sur. Thursday Sue and I took Surfing Lessons...you just got to see the photos, they speak for themselves! What a great time, we plan to do it again (well at least I do). Friday we headed up to San Francisco for the weekend, just hung out and relaxed in our not so great "hotel" room. Saturday we went to Alcatraz! Awesome. Then wandered around San Fran. Sunday we all went home...sad when you think that after that I won't see them for at least a year seeing as I don't plan to go home for Christmas this year. Which leads us to my next update...
(check out more photos here)
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I'm bound for England and Italy!

My tickets have been bought. There is no turning back now. I'm off to England and Italy for two and a half weeks in December!!! I get to see my sister, brother in law and nephew for 2 1/2 weeks...that will be the longest I have seem them in over two years, how crazy. I miss them so much, and each day it gets harder to live this far away. Hopefully at some point we'll actually live near each other or at least on the same coast. My nephew is getting so big and all I get to see is photos (don't get me wrong, they are great, but its not him). I can't wait to just hug him and hang out with him. To top it off we will be in Italy together. A life long dream about to come true. We plan to spend Christmas and New Years in Italy! Oh my goodness.

Only a few more months!


Ok well for now I guess that is it. Should probably go and get some reading done.

Friday, June 22, 2007

Surfrider International Surfing Day - June 21, 2007


Check out more photos from Carmel, CA at: http://www.flickr.com/gp/22456584@N00/46ysD8

Also check out Surfrider - www.surfrider.org for more info on them and all they do!

Sunday, April 29, 2007

Invisible




Every feel invisible? Even to those you are closest with?
Ever feel like if you were to just leave for a while no one would really notice?
Ever feel like you are just walking around with out really living?
Ever feel like you are living someone else's life?

We say we are friends and close but are we really? If I don't pick up the phone or send the e-mail will you remember to? Will you take the initiative at some point? At what point would you do that? Do you really want to know what is going on when you say "how are you? whats going on with you?". Do you want the truth or are you being superficial? What makes us friends and not just acquaintances?

Monday, February 26, 2007

Selfishness


(most of you who know me know this side of me)

So this week I watched a movie called Paradise Now to sum it up quickly its a foreign film that is about suicide bombers. Something about that movie that hit me really hard and I couldn't figure out exactly what it was, but I think I know.

The whole act of what they do is so they can be in "Paradise", but someone in the movie asked "what about us who remain here", and they are right what about those people you leave behind. Now I'm not really talking about "suicide bombers", but suicide in general. What a selfish act. You take your life but never think twice about the ones you leave behind to clean up the mess. They are the ones that have to live with this every day of their lives. They have to pick up the pieces daily and start all over again. Why do they have to do this? Because you can't handle life, its to rough, nothing is working to your plan, no one loves you...oh the list I could make here. But life is never that bad, no break up is ever that bad, nothing is ever bad enough to take your own life and leave a mess for those you love and better yet for those who love you. You may think this is the easy way out, but its not.

Why can I say this with such conviction? Because I have been there, I struggled with suicidal thoughts (and actions for that matter), depression and cutting for many many years. Its been hard to overcome but its possible. The scars on my wrists will never let me forget, and will always be a reminder of where I have been, how far I have come and God's love. Love is possible. Rescue is possible. Ask for help. Seek God. Seek counsel. Seek wisdom.

When I was dealing with this I was younger, I was sent to talk with psychiatrists, put on some meds for depression, but honestly only one thing only got me threw all of this and that was God, for that I am forever grateful.

To help those who struggle or if you are struggling with this check out www.twloha.com (To Write Love On Her Arms). They are an amazing organization that help people with issues of depression, cutting and suicide. I wish there were resources like this when I was dealing with this.

I'm sorry to those I hurt in this selfishness of mine. Looking back I now realize the hurt and damage this could of caused if I continued down this path. I didn't realize then how selfish I really was.

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Back from the Philippines! Update and Photos



Hello Everyone,

Here is a recap of our trip to the Philippines. It has taken me so long to do this, because I’m having a hard time putting it into words. Expression through words isn’t my gift (that’s why I take pictures). This most likely will not be day-by-day, just in a random order as it comes to my mind. I’ll do my best to include as much as possible with out boring you, hope it makes a bit of sense…

It was amazing! A wonderful eye opening experience. Here we have the poor all around, but for some reason it so much more impacting in other countries (at least to me anyway). Here we have the means to get people off the streets, but it just doesn’t happen…there many don’t have any opportunity, yet their seems to be a peace and happiness that surround them. Some of these people may be poor to our standards but they are richer than I will ever be, that blows my mind.

I fell in love with it. The country, the beauty of my surroundings, the welcoming attitudes, people, the food and Mango shakes. I’ve had the opportunity to travel before, but never have I experienced and welcome like this. After only a few hours these people became like family that I haven’t seen in a while. There were no boundaries, just open arms and lots of love.

We traveled from San Francisco to Taipei to Manila stayed there for four days went to Dumaguete for two days then to Bacolod for a day. Each place is beautiful in its own ways. From city life to beach town. Most of our travel from place to place was by planes, but from Dumaguete to Bacolod it was by bus. A five and a half hour trip in a non air-conditioned bus. I actually preferred this to the ac. We had the windows down enjoying the scenes and smells (good and bad).

The Romans it talks about mutual encouragement, and that would sum up this purpose for this trip. We were there to do/help what ever it is that they needed, although I feel like I got more out of it than I gave. One of our first days in Manila we went with Pastor Lito (Pastor of CC Manila) and a few of the member of the church to paint the brick walls (back yard area) for the children at the DSW (Department of Social Welfare). These children are there due to abuse and neglect until they can locate other family members or adoptive parents to take them.

Before going we were told no pictures were allowed because many of these children have on going court cases. We got there, painted the back wall and left wall white and had so much extra we did all that walls we could. On the back wall some of the team members drew a Noah’s Ark theme , the rest of us scrubbed the ground to get the paint drippings off, played with the children and after the sketch was done we all pitched in to bring it color and life. Half of us left in the first van to head back to the church for lunch, but as we were getting ready to leave they asked us to come back and take a picture with the children! In only a matter of hours they trusted us. To walk back in and see the painting and the children’s faces as they came out was priceless.

We visited three churches: Calvary Chapel Manila, Calvary Chapel Dumaguete and Calvary Chapel Bacolod (Calvary Chapel Children’s Home). All of them amazing in their own ways, and also very different. CCM is smaller, a narrow room with now windows, amazing people. As we sat their for their mid week service all the kids were in the back two rows singing their best during worship and I had tears in my eyes. I just stood there listening to them and thought (I know several others thought similar things), “I wonder if this is what heaven will sound like with all the voices echoing like this”. It was beautiful. We spent the most time at CC Manila and I just love those people so much (sure I’ve said that a few times already). I kept asking for the recipes for all the food they were cooking for us, so one night they decided to show us how to make of them. We learned to make turon, a desert that was amazing. I can’t even explain what it felt like to be there cooking with them. It reminded me of growing up, with my grandmother teaching me how to cook. It was great and I’m sure something I will never forget.

CC Dumaguete felt like we were back in the states. It was large, awesome people and the worship again was great. When you looked up there is a huge dove on the ceiling. We didn’t have a service at CC Bacolod but it also is a Children’s Home and currently they have about 140 children. There is a school there also. These children are amazing. They all have chores and help one another, I didn’t see any signs of frustration or aggravation of having so many siblings, just pure love for one another. They put on a performance for us, it was awesome. They all had matching outfits (that they made!), sang and danced, it was great. Everyone of them were involved in one way or another.

In total we visited three "orphanages", all of them broke my heart in a different way. I do hope and pray to be able to adopt one day, I don't know from where, but being there just hit home really hard for me. The people that work there are amazing and have huge hearts. I could only hope for that.

We went to the American Cemetery in Manila one day. Talk about a breathtaking humbling experience. I will be the first to admit I know little to nothing about history, but I was in awe. To see all of those names and crosses blew me away. As we walked threw and looked at them all I noticed some familiar names…two that stuck out. Two of which may be on my mom’s side of the family, and both were from MA.

We stayed at New Tribes Missions in Manila (www.ntm.org) These people were wonderful to let us stay with them. I had a few opportunities to talk with them about their experiences so far and also to meet other missionaries that are stationed or have been stationed in the Philippines. Check out their site and what they are all about when you have a chance.

Seeing as we weren’t staying at the church we got picked up and dropped off by members of the church, but one day we got to ride in Jeepneys! Jeepneys are a main form of transportation in the Philippines. They were originally made from US military jeeps left over from World War II and are well known for their flamboyant decoration and crowded seating. They have also become a symbol of Philippine culture.

We were complete outsiders, definitely the minority, but I felt at home. Never really thought about being an outside much. I enjoyed getting to walk around and see life from out side of a moving car. I think every place we went I uttered the words “I could live here”.

The driving and traffic reminded me quite a bit of China. Very dysfunctional and unorganized yet organized at the same time.

In one day we saw metro Manila, the “Beverly Hills” section with Polo Clubs and all and then we saw where the “squatters” lived. Its amazing the difference and how just a turn at the next set of lights can bring you into a whole new world and way of life.

I met so many wonderful people, saw unforgettable things and learned a lot in a short time. I hope this and my photos gives you a bit of insight to my trip and experience. Again, its been hard to put it into words, but thank you all very much for your prayers, support and encouragement. I wasn’t ready to leave and I’m looking forward to going back in the future.

For more photos please visit: Philippines Photos

Blessings,
Jenny

Monday, January 08, 2007

Flights, Birthday, Christmas, Death, New Year...



A lot has happened since my last post...I'll do my best to include it all.

In the last post I mentioned that my Grandfather had suffered from a heart attack and wasn't doing well. I flew home in November, because we thought we were going to lose him. He came around though. He was moving along (not at a fast speed, but slight improvements). I had a week to spend as much time with him as I could, just hanging out in the hospital. He couldn't move or even talk, but it didn't matter that much. The last time I saw him before heading home, I got a kiss and told him I would be back at Christmas, he kept saying no, he finally came around and said yes.

I flew home for Christmas and saw him on Christmas morning for a couple of hours. I told him that I would see him in two days, my dad and I would come back to visit him. To all of our surprise, the day after Christmas he was rushed back to the hospital from his rehab. All five of his daughters, his three oldest grandchildren (well four), and my father were at the hospital that night. He had the chance to say good bye to all of us and give us kisses one last time. Around 10:30 that night he went to be with Jesus. It was quick and peaceful, and a blessing. I wasn't prepared, but I know he is in a much better place, and I couldn't ask for anything better for him. I miss you...

I had a crazy flight home for Christmas. The guy next to me was unbelievable...to the point of almost having to land the plane and get him off. Spent the first day and nigh at Becky and Mikes (always a good time, but never long enough). Spent the day with Becky in Boston...our favorite thing to do! Got to go to Johnny Cupcakes! And of course hot pot in China Town! Yum Yum.

Got to spend time with my family (more than expected, but it was really good!). I even got a day to hang out with my dad. We fly to Nantucket for lunch and then hung out there and the cape for a few hours just taking photos. We even got to go to the Cape Cod Board Walk and see our board (see photo above)! I got to spend Christmas morning with my mom, which I haven't done in many years. I had a ton of time to spend with my sister, brother in law and my awesome newphew. No matter how much time I have it never seems like enough!

For my birthday I got a lot of cool things...dvd's, itunes gift cards, a turtle named Aslan (which still hasn't arrived!!) and best of all a photograph from one of my favorite photographers, Scott Harrison. Thanks to my awesome and wonderful sister (brother in law and newphew...of course). She gave me an envelope with some e-mails in it, I didn't even have to read the first line, all I saw was "Hello Scott," and I started to cry. Its amazing, She is amazing for thinking of this, and he is an amazing photographer and person for letting me have a print of his.

Couldn't of asked for a better birthday.

What did I do for New Year's Eve after a long emotion filled week home...I slept! Oh yes went to bed at 9:30 (I had to wake up at 5:00 to leave for the airport to head back West).

Now, I'm getting ready for my trip to the Philippines!! I leave on the 14th for 9 days. I'll be sure to post some stories/thoughts when I return along with photos.

Hope this sums everything up! For more photos check out my flickr site

A new magazine to check out: NEED Magazine